


To Love A Ghoul

by RenjiRin69



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: /Reader, CCG - Freeform, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Lemon, Reader-Insert, Smut, ghoul reader, x Reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-22
Updated: 2015-10-22
Packaged: 2018-04-27 12:55:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5049388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RenjiRin69/pseuds/RenjiRin69





	To Love A Ghoul

Today was my first day as an investigator, we were placed in pairs to train for a few weeks before the next raid. Everyone seemed to have partners and I was the odd number.

 

"I see you don't have a partner, perhaps I can change that?"

 

To my surprise and fortune I was paired with the former trainer/teacher and now top investigator Amon Koutarou. I was so nervous, reason one, he is very strong, two, I have a huge crush on him, and three I am a ghoul. I wanted to become an investigator, the ghouls today are terrible, just killing, not to survive but just to kill for sport. I want to stop the ghouls like that, that is why I am here, but I am worried and maybe afraid that someone will find out my secret and kill me and/or even torture me, thinking that I'm an informant. But I am not alone in this, I will make this country a better place both for humans and ghouls. I was taken out of my daze to a concerned Amon.

 

"Are you okay, you're [F/N] right? I'm Amon Koutarou, since your training with me, I hope your offense and defense is as good as I have heard."

 

My cheeks tint a shade of pink at his praise, 'damn, if he knew what I was he would kill me, snap out of it.' I smile back at him.

 

"I guess you'll just have to see for yourself."

 

He turns away clearing his throat and I thought I saw a pink dusting on his cheeks.

 

"U-Um yeah lets do it...I-I mean, not that I-I mean lets train. Uhh s-sorry if you're uncomfortable."

 

I chuckle at his over reacting, "It's okay head investigator, lets get started."

 

A few days of training has passed with really no words, and it was awkward, we both had gotten flustered when we got close or when we would pin down the other. We decided to take a break for lunch and things were quiet as usual until Amon cleared his throat.

 

"Um [F/N], can I ask you a personal question?"

 

I'm chewing my food trying to keep it down, "Sure, what would you like to know?"

 

"Why are you here, what is your purpose?" 

 

I sit my food down to show him that he has my full attention, "I want to rid this world of the ghouls who kill to just kill, so we can have peace with them."

 

His eyes widen, "What do you mean, all ghouls kill to kill, they don't think, they survive on instinct, they are vicious monsters that need to be killed."

 

I turn my head using my hair to cover my misty eyes and I shrug my shoulders, "You're probably right Amon...Hey can we call it a day?"

 

"Um sure, do you need a ride home [F/N]?"

 

I get up and walk away, "No, my legs work just fine, see ya Amon."

 

I left sad and a little angry, I went to the coffee shop where I saw Renji enter before me. We exchange nods as he holds the door open for me and I thank him. I am welcomed by many faces as I sit to receive a cup of coffee and I get some food to go. I drink the 'amazing as always' coffee and Renji sits by me.

 

"Haven't seen your face in a while [F/N], you aren't in any trouble are you, because if you are, don't bring it here."

 

I smile, "You know I don't get into any trouble, now you are just teasing me Renji."

 

He gives me a blank stare as if he was proud to have messed with me. I finish my coffee with small chat until someone entered the coffee shop. I turned and to my surprise it was Amon, 'what is he doing here, is he on an investigation.' He looks around and spots me and his features soften as he strides over to me.

 

"[F/N] thank goodness, I was worried since you took off looking upset, and since its night, if-if a ghoul showed up and hurt you, I-I don't know what I would do."

 

"I'm okay Amon, it doesn't matter."

 

He gets closer and grabs my shoulder, "It does matter you are important to m- to the company, you are strong, but don't put yourself in danger-"

 

Suddenly Renji grabbed his jacket and put Amon to the ground, "We don't condone violence here sir, if you are here to harm [F/N], I will stop you."

 

Renji takes off his coat revealing a white t-shirt and his huge muscles being exposed but I stop him.

 

"Renji, it's alright, we were just leaving anyway, right Amon?"

 

Renji stops looking at me and Amon looks up at me too, "Uh, eh yeah."

 

I pay and Amon walks me to his apartment, since I needed to be protected from the ghouls. Once we enter his apartment he offers me a shower which I accept gladly. Once out he takes one as I watch TV. He exits coming in with only pajama pants and a towel around his neck, I turn away blushing like crazy.

 

"[F/N], do you want something to drink, sorry, I'm kind of a bad host."

 

I nod, "Some coffee please."

 

He nods and he goes to brew a pot. He comes back with the coffee and we both sit on the couch watching TV but I really wasn't paying attention, I was crazy nervous over Amon.

 

"Uhh [F/N], I-I was wondering, that Renji guy, is he like..your boyfriend or something."

 

I look at him eyes wide slightly in shock, "Wha.. Renji... No, Me and Renji aren't anything, we've just been friends for a long time, he is like family, all of the staff at the coffee shop look out for me, and for that I am thankful."

 

He relaxes his shoulders and looks down, "Do-do you have a boyfriend?"

 

My eyes dart to him, "N-no of course not, just look at me, it's kind of obvious, and plus with our line of work I'm afraid to love, what if I die..."

 

He looks up and moves over to take my hands and looked at my saddened features, "What do you mean, 'It's Obvious' you're beautiful, and you shouldn't live as if you're already dead, loving someone is natural, don't push that away. If they felt the same, and you reserved the feelings to save the hurt, that is wrong, you need to embrace your love."

 

My eyes widen, "Amon, don't say such silly things, once I joined here, I already died, well in reality I was born dead, there are things about me that I don't want you to know, I can never be accepted."

 

I am shocked when Amon gives me a strong hug enclosing his large arms around me, "[F/N], don't say such things, you are alive, and I speak the truth, you're beautiful and I would accept all of you... I guess what I'm getting at is...Would y-you like to go out with me sometime?"

 

He pulls back the hug to look at me, "C-Could you really accept me?"

 

He smiles wiping a tear that fell down my cheek, "Of course, I-I really care about you, and I want to protect you."

 

I smile again, "Okay, I would love to have coffee again with you sometime, but before any of that, I need you to accept me."

 

"I already said that I-"

 

My eyes turn to ghoul and his smile turns into a frown and he had the look of betrayal. I knew it, I never should have said anything, now he is going to kill me, but I guess it's okay.

 

"Y-You're a-a ghoul, did you know about my feelings, did you use my emotions to lure me here to kill me?"

 

He looks hurt, like I played him or something. I wrap my arms around him and he stiffens like I was going to bite him, but all there was were tears on his bare chest.

 

"A-Amon, accept me, we aren't all bad, and for your information you took me to your house, I could never use you, I care for you far too much."

 

He looks into my ghoul eyes and then he smiles, "I guess it is ironic, I fell in love with what I am supposed to kill."

 

He hugs me again, "Could you stay here, it's not safe at night for humans and ghouls, I can sleep on the couch and you can take my room if you'd like."

 

I blush slightly, "S-Sure, but I don't know this house and I get nervous and can't sleep, could you stay in your room as well... Just until I fall asleep, you can leave if you want to after that, I won't bite.....Bad joke hehe."

 

He is flustered, same as me, he nods and he takes me to his room. The bed is pretty large, it has dark blue blankets and pillows, and a dark brown headboard. I lay down and he follows suit, both of us are nervous but we cover up, it was still cold and I shiver.

 

"Amon, I-I'm cold."

 

In a few seconds he wraps his arms around me resting his sculpted chest against my back and I shudder at the contact, "Is that warmer." [haha Sweden joke]

 

"Y-Yeah, thanks Amon."

 

I felt safe enclosed with him but I was still nervous, even more now. I sigh and try to relax until I felt his hot breath reach my neck making me jump slightly and he notices, "Uh sorry."

 

"It's fine, you have to breath, and I'm warmed up now so you don't have to hold on to me if you don't want to."

 

He lets go and I hear him get up, I am startled as he starts counting loudly, I turn on the lamp to see a a shirtless Amon doing pushups like a mad man. 

 

"Amon, what are you-"

 

"How could I think, I need to distract myself, control, I need more control!"

 

He seems to be talking to himself so I get up to touch his shoulder making him jump but he sits down cross legged on the floor panting. He had a light coating of sweat, I think I drooled slightly at his steaming body.

 

"Control what Amon?"

 

His eyes widen and turns away with a slight blush, "N-Nothing, I was just talking to himself, no need to worry, I just have a lot on my plate."

 

I get upset, 'a lot on his plate', is it because I am a ghoul, is he afraid? I know he said that he accepts me, but his actions say otherwise. I get up and grab my coat and shoes and put them on and he stands up.

 

"What's wrong [F/N]?"

 

"I think it's best if I leave, I'm sure taking in everything is probably scary and you need some time to think, I get it, so I better get going, sorry for taking up your time."

 

I went to leave but I was turned around to see Amon with mixed emotions, I show my ghoul eyes again, "Are you afraid of me."

 

He smiles, rubbing my cheek with his hand, "How could I, you have the same emotions of a human woman, so damn stubborn, but yet you are more beautiful than any human, I've told you that I accepted you, what ever you need me to do to prove myself I will do it. Please, ever since you'd joined, you've intrigued me, you were different and I wanted to get to know you....Now come back to me, stay over, it's too dangerous."

 

His eyes pierced through my heart, I saw that he was begging for me to stay. I nod as my eyes get glossy. He puts his hand on my cheek and rests his forehead on mine and I chuckle. 

 

"Now how could I say no to them puppy dog eyes, you're too damn cute, it pisses me off."

 

He chuckles, "You're beautiful, and seeing you with me makes me very happy, now lets get some rest, we don't have work tomorrow, but I would like to make you breakfast in the morning ."

 

I smile awkwardly, "You know I can't eat human food Amon."

 

His smile fades, "[F/N] I'm sorry, I just, damn that was stupid of course ghouls can't-"

 

"Amon, it's okay, don't get so worked up on such a thing, lets just rest now, we'll see about ordering at a restaurant in the morning."

 

He looks confused and questioning, "What kind of restaurant?"

 

"One that help out ghouls, it's a bar, Renji usually is there with his friend Uta, but you must never tell the CCG about the people you meet with me, they must never know, the CCG kill the good and the bad, that is why I joined you, to rid the bad ghouls and save the good ones, so we can live peacefully."

 

He kisses my forehead making me blush, "Sounds good, we can talk more about the plans tomorrow."

 

I nod as we get back into his bed spooning and enjoying each others warmth until we both fell asleep. 

 

The morning came slow since my nightmares kept me off an on in the night, good thing Amon is a heavy sleeper. I keep on having the same dream, the dream of my past when I was ambushed in a raid by the CCG, and who was the leader of the raid, it was Amon Koutarou. They had been after me for a while, I am what they had labeled the Bengal Ghoul, my mask looked like a tiger. It was hard to fight since I was intrigued by his skill, then when he cut me is when I always wake up from my dream, to see the man who cut me. But he doesn't know my ghoul identity. I get up to shower and I view my scars from that day, my right shoulder had an indention since the scar was so deep and ran down across my back. It was deep and has healed into a scar, but the pain from that day remained. I am taken away from my thoughts when I hear the bathroom door open.

 

"[F/N] I have finished drying your clothes, I'll sit them out here."

 

"Kay, thanks Amon."

 

He leaves and I get out to get dressed but Amon bursts in suddenly, "Sorry [F/N], I forgot your-"

 

I turn trying to hide my scar but it was too late. "[F/N], wha- who did this to you."

 

He runs to me ripping my towel off to look at my back in greif. He touches the scar softly making me jump slightly.

 

"Who would do such a thing, [F/N] what happened."

 

I couldn't tell him, what would I even say, 'Hey Amon, you did this to me, by the way I'm the Bengal Ghoul remember me now.' I look away but he turns me around to look into my misty red ghoul eyes.

 

"Amon, please.... don't make me tell you, I need to keep this burden to myself, I'm afraid if I tell you, you'll be upset."

 

He hugs me and kisses my forehead making me blush, "Please don't hide something that bothers you, tell me."

 

I sigh in his chest, "Can I at least get dressed first."

 

He jumps back blushing and studerring before he leaves me to get dressed. Once I enter the kitchen he is sitting at the table and he was still blushing. I clear my throat and he looks up at me as I sit down.

 

"So have you decided to tell me?"

 

I nod, "I really don't know how to tell you, but y-you are the one who gave me this scar."

 

His eyes widen with hurt and confusion, "When, I would have remembered you."

 

I look into his eyes, "No, I was wearing a mask, I was defending the ones I cared for with my life, but I couldn't hurt you because you intrigued me, and now I'm going to reveal the truth to you. Amon, I-I am the Bengal Ghoul."

 

He stands up in shock, "Y-You're serious, y-you..the Bengal...I thought we left you for dead."

 

"I was saved by Renji, we were friends and he helped me change and not kill humans."

 

He looks away, "So Renji, What ghoul is he?"

 

"The Raven."

 

He sits back down then takes my hand, "How could I hurt the good one, I-I I'm a monster, and you still helped us and became a part of the CCG, why?"

 

I smile, "Because I liked you, you fought different, you didn't care for the glory, you truly wanted to make a difference, sure you thought that all ghouls were bad, but you fought with honor and you intrigued me, so that is why."

 

"[F/N] I'm sorry that I did this to you, because of me you have that scar, I don't deserve you kindness."

 

I feel bad for him so I get up and walk to him, he pushes out his chair looking confused and I sit on his lap straddling him, he lifts his hands away flushed and nervous.

 

"[F-F/N] what are you-mph-."

 

I kiss him suddenly even surprising myself. This was not what I expected in a first kiss, me being the kisser, and to be kissing a human. I run my tongue along his lips making him grunt and he shakily parts his lips letting me explore. He starts reacting rubbing circles on my hips tugging on my pants and kissing back with the same hunger. I shudder as Amon runs his warm hands up my shirt to unclip my bra. I arch my back as we break the kiss, Amon attacks my neck with love bites making me moan.

 

"A-Amon I-I please."

 

He kisses my chin, "I know, let me help."

 

He unbuttons my pants and pushes his hand through my underwear rubbing along my folds, I buck into his touches and I look at Amon and he has his eyes locked with mine. His breath is ragged and I can feel him hardening under me so I get up, which it confused him as he showed a pouty face and I chuckle.

 

"If you want to continue...I don't want to lose my virginity on a chair."

 

He gets out of the chair eyes wide, "You're a-"

 

"Shut up, let's go."

 

He tails my every step like a puppy, "you don't have to- I mean, I'll be careful and good to you, I won't hurt you, you leave everything to me...I-"

 

I turn at the entry to his room and kiss him, "It's okay, I know that you are kind, I trust you."

 

He hugs me and he is a little shaky, he was probably nervous for me and was holding back to help me out. he picks me up both hands on my butt cheeks and he sits me on the bed, him getting on his knees while I'm on the foot of the bed. He takes my hand and kisses my knuckles and holds my hand to his closed eyes.

 

"[F/N], I really care for you, I don't want you to think that I am taking advantage of you, I haven't got close to anyone in a long time, after my life in the orphanage, I've never opened my heart to anyone, can I give you my heart? I-I think I love you, is that okay?"

 

I pull his hand up to me and I kiss his knuckle then I lead him to be on top of me and I kiss him, "It's okay Amon, I know that I can trust you, and I love you too, I would like us to open up to each other."

 

I'm holding the back of his head with my fingers running through his hair. He blushes slightly and avoids my gaze, "Amon?"

 

"C-Can.. don't make fun of me but I uhh.."

 

"what is it?"

 

"I-I'm the same as you."

 

"What? you mean that you are a ghoul too?"

 

"No I-I um I'm, I've never done anthing like this before either... I just have never found anyone that I liked enough, I'm not just going to have sex with anyone, I will only love once, and I choose you."

 

Now I was blushing as well, 'so we are both new at this, but he seemed so skilled, I guess he learned from reading about it maybe.' I kiss him while stripping our clothing, I blush and turn away as his last peice of clothing is discarded.

 

"You're so cute when you're embarrassed, I can't wait to hear what noises you make when I'm inside you."

 

I blush harder still avoiding his gaze, but that stops when he lays on me and lifts up one of my legs rubbing ghostly up and down my upper thigh. I shiver as Amon runs his tongue up the side of my neck to nibble my ear. My body responding to his touches, I arch up making my lower body come in contact with his. He moans huskly in my ear, the vibrations in his deep voice sends shivers up my body.

 

"A-Amon be gentle."

 

He looks at me with passion, want, and worry in his eyes, "I have already hurt you once and I can't forgive myself for the scars I gave you, I swear that I will never hurt you again."

 

His gaze turns to my scarred shoulder and his eyes sadden. I cup his cheek and turn him to face me, a single tear falls passed his cheek, I wipe it away.

 

"Amon, I know you wont hurt me, I trust you, the pain of my wounds are nothing compared to the pain of fear of your rejection of what I am, rejection of my feelings, Amon, I really do love you."

 

With my hand on his cheek he takes it and kisses it with a smile, "I love you as well, let us never part."

 

I nod as he leans down taking my lips again with as much passion and love as before. His body grinding against mine was unbearable, I moan in-between my gasps in his mouth, then his hand reaches in-between my legs making me stiffen. He looks at me immediately, his eyes asking for permission. I give a shy nod and wrap my arms around him. He inserts his middle finger making my grip a little tighter around him, shuddering as he thrusted. He kisses my neck and went down latching his mouth on one of my nipples, swirling his tongue and nibbling making the pleasure blind the pain as he inserted the second finger. Before I realized a third was inserted I was near my climax.

 

"A-Amon I-I'm close."

 

He stopped and pulled out his fingers and sticking them into his mouth, humming in approval as he stares at my blushing face.

 

"Do you feel good [F/N]?"

 

I'm panting but I manage to say, "Yeah, really good."

 

I sit up to make him lay on his back and he gasps when I take his now pulsing cock in my hand.

 

"[F-F/N], you don't need, I'm already ngh-."

 

I take him in my mouth, giving soft swirls and testing the suction that I needed to make Amon feel good as well. I bob my head earning a moan as he runs his fingers through my hair.

 

"[F/N], sh-shit ah, you're doing..so good, I'm c-close, hurry I want-stop, I want to be inside you...I need you so bad."

 

I pull off of him and he sits up and leans his back on the headboard with me on his lap, with my arms around his neck as we exchange a heated kiss. We are both moaning into the kiss, getting more aroused just from being close to one another, we break the kiss panting.

 

"[F/N], I'll help you lower yourself, just go at your own pace, I won't rush you, I love you, this is all for you babe, god I-I I'm so nervous, I'm just so glad that I have you now."

 

I give him a quick kiss and smile, "O-Okay Amon, I love you too, I'm really nervous and excited too."

 

I align myself and he helps on his end and I feel him rubbing his tip at my entrance and then he pushes in the head making me throw my head back.

 

"Mm ngh A-Amon it-"

 

"It's okay, j-just take your time, don't rush yourself."

 

I nod and I kiss Amon as I push down fully until skin met skin. We both shudder and moan with him wrapping his arms around my torso with me grasping his shoulders and shaking. Amon tightened his grip and pushed his face between my breasts and he sighed peacefully and smiles.

 

"Are you just another dream, are you really here."

 

I turned his head and put him where he could hear my heartbeat.

 

"Amon, do you hear that, I'm here, I'm real, and I'll always be here. Here next to you, I love you so much Amon."

 

A single tears slides down his cheek as he smiles again, I kiss him and begin to move. I let out a pained moan with Amon giving me worried looks but once I started to let out pleasurable moans he calmed down. He took one of my breasts in his mouth, giving strong licks making me moan out in approval. 

 

"Amon, do you-I-I mean are- how do you feel?"

 

He let out a shuddering moan, "Really good [F/N], you're so warm, I love you, I love you so much."

 

"Even if I'm a ghoul?"

 

He looks at me so lovingly and cups my chin, "It honestly shocked me when you told me, but it doesn't bother me, My love for you hasn't changed and it never will."

 

He kisses me again and then kissed down my neck and rocks his hips up making me moan loudly, he lets out a few 'it's okay's' and 'it will feel good I promise'. I release my Rinkaku type Kagune and his eyes light up.

 

"You're truly beautiful [F/N]."

 

He runs his hands along my Kagune, I gasp and arch my back, 'I guess I didn't know that my Kagune was sensitive.' I rocked my hips as the pain was leaving my body being replaced with pleasure. We moved at a steady pace with the both of us moaning out each others names.

 

"Amon..Amon, more..pl-please mngh."

 

Our tongues wrestled as Amon began bouncing my my body up and down, picking up the pace, Amon moved down to lay fully down to let me take over. I roll my hips and he reaches out to me, I take his hands and kiss his knuckles. He thrusts upward hitting just the right spots.

 

"A-Amon I'm-I'm close ngh."

 

He sits up and turns to where now he is on top and he lifts up my leg to move it above his shoulder. He looks into my eyes and I blush.

 

"I want to see your face properly, I don't want you to work for your release, I want to do it for you."

 

He pushes himself in again and moves at a rapid pace hitting the places that he did before.

 

"Ngh ah Amon I'm ngh, please, I'm gonna tch."

 

"[F/N] [F/N], let go, cum for me."

 

After those words the knot in my stomach snapped reaching my climax. Amon moaning out as my body tightens around him, he thrusts a few more times and he cums deep inside, so much that I feel some of the hot thick liquid pour out of me. I cry in his arms and after he comes down from his high he looks at me.

 

"Sorry, that I came inside."

 

I kiss him, "It's okay Amon, I forgive you."

 

He touches the inside of my thighs and feels his recent release and he flushes, "a-and sorry for cumming so much, I made a mess of you."

 

I chuckle and let out a little cry as he pulls out, "It's okay Amon, it felt really good, but to be honest I don't think that I'll ever get used to your size."

 

He flushes again as he starts studdering and avoiding my eyes as he muffles a 'be quiet'. I smile and I make him face me.

 

"But you're perfect, so I suppose I'm going to have to get used to you, at least we have our entire lives to learns everything about each other, but for now let us clean up."

 

I get up and he slaps my ass earning him a hiss and a yelp from me, "After you my dear."

 

I rub my now red hand printed behind and I huff, but I take him by the hand dragging him into the shower, 

 

"It saves water to shower together."

 

He smiles, "Whatever you say love."

 

I smile back at him, and now at I have Amon, I don't think I'll shower alone ever again.


End file.
